frightened of the future

i was thinking today about how in a few short weeks school is starting. and then i thought "wow. i only have two years left of highschool, i still have no idea what im doing with my life."

ever since freshman year, we've been expected to look to our future. sign up for certain classes that give us a taste of a profession and prepare us. but after two years of highschool i feel even less prepared. i just feel overwhelmed. i have no idea what i want to be or who i want to be when i get out of highschool. i know i want to go to college but unlike most people, i dont even have an idea of any college to go to. im not even sure what interests me. i know art makes me happy and fashion gets my mind moving and excited and i really like to write. but there arent really any reachable jobs with that. when i think of fashion and writing and art i think big citys: new york, london, paris, chicago. not fort lame, indiana. i just dont see myself getting anywhere from here. i need a taste of something new. i need something to give me a spark of inspiration. i always thought something would hit me and i would just know. i thought it would be fate. but i havnt seen a road sign pointing me in the direction i need to go yet. i guess ill just have to get through highschool and hopefully come across one.

i want to go on a roadtrip.

come with me?

i love you

ashleyy

urban word of the day:
Writer's crap
Derived from 'writer's cramp', writer's crap reffers to a stage when one is only capeable of writing utter crap.